2017 HPFT Golden Chalice Award: Most Versatile Author
2017 HPFF Dobby Award: Best Reviewer
2018 FROGS Award: Best Reviewer
aka: marauderfan on HPFF. Banners are made by me unless otherwise noted. On indefinite hiatus from writing
Bravery comes in many different forms, even for a Ravenclaw like Rose.
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I read the first chapter of this a while ago and am super glad this review swap reminded me to come back!
Hmm, this chapter gives no further indication than the previous one about what mysterious event happened in Rose's past. I had thought it was something that happened to Scorpius but seeing he is perfectly fine and apparently not suffering any panic attacks as Rose does, I'm stumped. And something tells me that there will be quite a few chapters of mystery before it's all revealed :p
I love the relationship between Scorpius and Rose and how they really seem to understand one another. They're cute. The conversation they were imagining between Molly II and Wolfram was quite funny, it really seemed that Rose was managing very well despite being in a loud, overstimulating place that makes her uncomfortable. When she left to get drinks I had a bad feeling about it and then that creep showed up! Who is he! How did he get in? ugghh. Poor Rose, it must have been so awful for her :(
the scene where she and Scorpius are both changing their shirts and then Albus comes in (also shirtless) was so hilarious because it just felt like such an out of place scene and so ridiculous, and I love how Rose thought the same (why don't we just invite Nana Molly and call it Christmas? - brilliant XD)
I am really curious about what happened and whether the man that attacked Rose at the party is in some way connected to the events of two years ago.
Your narrative voice is wonderful and I'm really enjoying this story! Thanks for the swap :)
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Wow, this was such an intense chapter!
I had a suspicion in one of the earlier chapters that something had happened to Scorpius, but I wasn't expecting anything quite this bad. I feel like this must be part of the reason why Scorpius and Rose can relate to each other so much, having both gone through a really horrible ordeal. As much as Scorpius is a comfort to Rose after all she's been through, the fact that he's been holding on to her shirt for this long implies a lot about how she helps him cope as well.
I have a feeling Astoria was about to say "It's not safe", which makes me think she knew something, possibly was expecting to be attacked? Or was expecting someone to attack Scorpius and when that person couldn't find him they went after Draco and Astoria instead? Either way, omg. intense. and so sad.
It makes me especially sad because the last interaction he had with them was a fight, and trying specifically to irritate them. :(
The way you wrote Scorpius' discovery of their deaths was just so chilling. The way you wrote it is phenomenal too - it's just a lot of details that he sees, smells, hears, but it takes him a while to really process the scene and realise that his parents are dead - it's just too much of a shock for him to comprehend all at once. It gave me chills. Gah, this section is just so sad. I particularly liked this line My head hit the mantle hard and I turned around in surprise that there were actually solid objects still existing in the universe. -- as it shows how disconnected Scorpius feels, like what he's seeing can't possibly be real, and then hitting the fireplace reminds him where he is, kind of brings him back to earth.
This was so sad. But a really powerfully written chapter -great writing.
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Hi Beth! I'm here for the review hot seat!
A kitchen accident. -- Nnnoooppe. I don't believe a word of it, not for a second. Wasn't Astoria saying to Scorpius just in the last chapter something about "it's not safe"? She knew, or at least suspected something was up. I hope Scorpius doesn't believe the Official Ministry Report either, because it's a cover-up.
I would’ve seen the leak in the stove – or smelled it -- but he does believe it! I guess I can understand him not being suspicious yet though. He's still kind of in shock and hasn't fully processed what happened. He's more caught up in the fact that it happened and not in why. I wonder if he'll start to think about that, especially given the last things his parents said to him, once he's had more time to adjust. Either that or I'm seeing things that aren't there...
Aw. I love that Rose and Albus came to visit him, that scene was so emotional and such a wonderful thing. like, it's impossible to process grief totally on your own, and they were exactly what he needed, just being there for support. Aw ♥
Oh no, poor Scorpius. Angry visiting Weasley family members who don't know the whole story - that's the last thing he needs when "it's not what it looks like" isn't going to get him anywhere. This scene was really well written though, with Ron overreacting and Rose shutting him down, and Harry being so used to Ron's outbursts that he's quick to react and hold Ron back without batting an eye. I laughed at Rose's departing line about "something untoward with the toilet", hahaha!
I love your interpretation of Daphne's story, as well. Makes a lot of sense, as the Greengrasses weren't known to be staunch supporters of Voldemort, and while their loyalties during the war are uncertain, the effects of the war are bound to have had an impact on her and Astoria.
All you need to know, Scorpius, is that you are much more like your mother than me.” -- Aww. This honestly says so much and I really liked this line. Although Draco hasn't appeared in this story much (and based on what happened last chapter, he won't be appearing much) I feel like I already have a pretty clear idea of who he is. He's definitely not proud of what he did during the war, regrets it, but still holds it against himself, hence why he never talks about it. I think he's happy Scorpius is a lot more like Astoria.
Small thing, but in that last section about Scorpius going to stay with the Potters, often you say "the Potter's house" when that should be a plural possessive, i.e. "Potters' house". Otherwise, the chapter is perfect. I'm really glad to have come back to read more of this story - can't believe how much I missed it. Onto the next chapter!
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Another one for the hot seat!
Aah, seriously, who thinks the cruciatus curse isn't enough and actually invents a spell that intensifies it?!? Poor Rose, I can't believe she suffered six days of that. I did appreciate learning more about Rose's back story here though, and I'm glad she is starting to come face to face with her trauma rather than hiding from it. Of course that will be difficult, but she has good friends who love her and maybe soon she'll be able to open up to people about her captivity.
I, myself, had been brought up by Ron Weasley, so a little burp here and there didn’t even register on my radar. -- haha. For some reason I really loved this. I can just see like, 6-year-old Rose burping at breakfast and Ron saying "good one" and Hermione being exasperated. :P
Drunk Scorpius. Aw. Gah, these two SO obviously like one another and it's obvious, but I also feel like they have a lot of personal issues to get through before they can be together (at least that's probably how they see it?) Nothing like jealousy to make you realize your feelings for someone :-/ but I also can't really blame Scorpius for behaving like that. He was going through a lot and had no idea how to cope. I love that Rose is still so supportive of him and not bitter about her past with him.
Another wonderful chapter :)
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Finally, we had dinner with Harry and Ginny, who never forgot the anniversary. -- This is so believable. Of course Harry would feel a lot of connection with a kid who's also lost his parents and has nowhere else to go - he was the same. I love this... especially because it shows how much Harry cares for Draco Malfoy's son, regardless of his history with Draco himself. That says so much about Harry. What a good person :)
eep Scorpius' thoughts about Rose are so cute. how he just wants to see her every day all the time. So yeah, he may not technically be a teenager anymore but based on the way he's acting... Aw. Young love :P
Oh I love that you described exactly what sort of corruption was going on in the Auror department (I mean, we knew the rest of the Ministry had problems, but it's nice to see the specifics for that department) and how Harry was able to restructure it.
haha that's like the classic teacher move, calling the person who's disrupting the class up to the front to 'volunteer' for whatever thing. Even worse when it's your dad noticing you not paying attention... Sorry, Albus! :P
Thank goodness for Scorpius intervening and saving the day. I think everyone else was too scared to..
“Albus Severus!” -- oh boy
Poor Al, though. He is under a lot of pressure. And I honestly loved the way they sorted all of that out. Harry has grown up a lot since Hogwarts, and seeing the way he handled that situation was really great. I think Al is very similar to how Harry was at that age, so Harry understands what his son needs. They can't both be hot-headed in this situation, and he recognized Al's achievements, and Scorpius's as well and it all turned out fine with no hard feelings. Good job Harry. And Scorpius of course.
I love that you had the Auror dept using the animal acronyms for their exams as well haha, the SNAKEs
Haha, Al at the end. What a sneaky devil :P
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I can find it kind of believable that Rose can't relate to Ron as well as she can relate to her uncle Harry. I mean, I totally see Harry as being super close with all of his family because he never had a family growing up, whereas Ron had a lot of brothers and is just better at relating to boys.
geez I can't believe Harry and Al were just chilling in his office while Al HAD BROKEN RIBS. I mean, seriously. Priorities. Thank goodness Rose stopped by.
YAY ROSE. That's a step in the right direction to talking about her feelings! It could easily be that she and Scorpius will just cuddle and hold hands and not talk about it (this is actually quite likely) but... she has to catch on by now that Scorpius likes her. That goofy grin was enough to give it away to even the most oblivious people.
And of course Harry has noticed :P
Aw, this chapter was really cute. Great work on it - I'm really loving the story so far!
WOWWW what a chapter! Okay, I'm here to leave reviews for your (belated) holiday wishlist and picking up right where I left off from my last binge of reading this story. Yikes, this chapter was INTENSE.
Can I also just take a moment to say that I saw this story was nominated for a Dobby for Best Villain and it's certainly easy to understand why. Stannous is terrifying, even more so because of this chapter: You've given him a background as a helpful, normal teacher who wanted his students to succeed and was well liked. Did something happen to him or was he just a mastermind plotting this whole thing for years? (Sidenote, Hogwarts has the worst trends of unintentionally hiring psychopaths as Professors. I haven't forgotten Barty Crouch Jr.) What on earth made him do this to Rose - what was the point of it? What exactly was he even doing? And why/how is he back now?? Basically, there are a lot of questions raised about Stannous that I really want answers to. But so far that makes him a really excellent villain, so congrats on the nomination.
UGHHH THIS STORY IS JUST SOOO GOOD and I'm really glad to be back and reading it again and also WHERE IS ROSE?!?!
Sorry about capslock I'm just really excited.
Oh, and in all the chaos of the end I forgot to mention that Rose and Scorpius are cute together.
Awesome chapter! I'll be back to read more of this ASAP and hopefully will leave a more coherent review next time XD.
So glad to find out Rose wasn't captured again and that she was at home and had her friends around to help her. I was really impressed with Dom and Selenia here - they are exactly the sorts of friends she needs, strong, caring, and level headed in a crisis.
This chapter was so powerful emotionally, particularly that scene where Scorpius and Al go to vent some steam, and Scorpius realizes how he feels about Rose, and they're both just angry because there's nothing they can do at the moment and that they couldn't do anything before, or that they just found out Rose has been suffering alone for two years- and are just taking out all of that on the forest. (But, as a botanist I admit I kind of cringed at all the destruction of trees. I know this makes me sound insensitive but, the trees!)
This really was an impressive chapter though, character wise. And I'm so glad Rose will be okay- but what an absolutely terrifying thing to witness, and then to find out that she has these deep scars she's been hiding for so long. In a way, though, I'm glad her friends know about them now because it's a lot easier to share a burden than to carry it alone, and maybe it'll give her the freedom to feel safe talking about it to her friends.
As always, wonderful writing, Beth. ♥
Another really intense chapter. Poor Rose, in the beginning there- she's still so on edge after what happened and was asleep when Scorpius dropped in, that she actually hexes him on instinct! Poor Scorpius too, for that matter. I feel like that one event kind of sums up a lot of their relationship. like, they're both pretty terrible at communicating with one another and end up at odds when really there's no need for it.
I noticed SCorpius keeps trying to distance himself from her because he thinks she wants the space, but she thinks she's scaring him off and that's why he's keeping distance. True, they have lots of other important think to think about, but they need to talk about their feelings and their relationship :P Despite their communication issues, he is at least always there for her when she needs it the most.
I'm so glad they told Harry! And actually, reading that bit made me consider just how dumb it was that she didn't say anything sooner, like about the sketchy guy at the party :P I mean, I totally understand why. She doesn't want people to think of her as a victim, and for her it's easiest to just put it out of mind and then she can convince herself nothing happened, and then she can feel like the person she was before. But she can't really do that, so telling people, ensuring her safety, etc will help her move past it, not bury it and pretend it never happened.
The scene at the end with Rose and Harry was so sweet. I bet Harry is the best uncle ever.
Phenomenal chapter once again!
I must admit when I first saw the summary of this chapter I was so curious in what context this phrase was going to occur. It did not disappoint XD
Ah, Rose and Scorpius had one misunderstanding after another in this chapter and as frustrating as it is to know that the characters are both wrong about each other, that sort of thing is always so fun to read, haha. Scorpius' internal panic about coming across as a pervert was pretty funny.
Also I love Dom, and how she is the same around Rose as she was before - it probably really helps Rose feel normal. Poor Harry though, I can see how he would really be acting differently and how he would feel like he let her down. With the reputation he has for saving the whole wizarding world, it would really hurt him that he wasn't able to do anything for one of his own family.
I'm so glad Scorpius and Rose finally talked and that they actually know where each other stands. I'm curious about Scorpius' healing spell - that's so interesting that it's hereditary and I really want to know how it works and what situations it works in.
Beth! I'm here for the winter wonderland- and so glad to return to this novel! I have missed it.
I like the way the Aurors are putting together all the information and I think the way you've written everyone's reactions to it is quite realistic. Of course ALbus is going to be more emotionally attached to this case and some of the details/options the mentees are suggesting will bother him because this is his cousin they're talking about - he can't possibly be objective. The outside, subjective perspective is essential here. But the mentee Aurors are right - nothing about the case makes sense, about Stannous' motives. It's almost like he didn't have a motive.
I love the little note about Scorpius teacing Rose the Malfoy family recipes, because the idea of Scorpius learning all these recipes from his mum is really sweet. And also it says a lot about how close Rose and Scorpius are ;). Although maybe this could be just because his family is a little less protective of family recipes than mine, haha.
What a good question to end the chapter on. I'm wondering that myself. Reading on!
(ps great chapter!)
Ok, so Scorpius' healing spell - I'll just say that right before I started reading chapter 12, I read 11 again to remind myself where I'd left off in the story and I noticed something about the healing spell because I'm a nerd and so read the spell backwards just to see if I could figure it out. And iit's about love. No dark magic. But I can see why he won't tell her exaclty what it is :P Aw. It is really sweet though, that it worked.
So these certain circumstances that Ruth says, I think I know what they are. ;)
I love that there's a healer named Astatine. I'm 99% sure that's a chemical element and it makes sense that someone with that name would go into the wizarding world's equivalent of science :P This seems to be a theme throughout the wizarding world, anyway, as Pomona Sprout taught Herbology and that's also very convenient.
Also reading on, Selenia sounds a whole lot like Selenium and I'm starting to think you did this on purpose.
Wow though , that second half was so emotional. Poor Rose - I can't even imagine how hard that is to be a healer, in charge of a patient and sometimes there is just nothing you can do - that'd be so hard to accept. (I could never be a medical doctor.) But I'm so glad to know that her discovery saved a lot of lives, and that probably softens the blow a little. And the hard-to-please supervisor was proud of her, so that's really wonderful too.
I'm glad Rose finally got her moment with Scorpius too ;) I think you led up to it really well.
On one hand it's nice that Rose feels up to going out. On the other hand part of me is going DANGER WILL ROBINSON. Stannous is still out there somewhere and he can get through wards. I'm nervous about how this is going to turn out..
I love that Rose is having a good time and feeling normal talking about normal things with her friends but I still have this underlying sense that something bad is going to happen.
Omg Dom is the most indiscreet person and I'm laughing so hard.
Ah. Rose hasn't told her father yet that she and Scorpius are dating. I can't say I blame her - Ron isn't the sort of person who will take that too well at first :P
A DISTURBANCE IN THE PUB NOOOOOOOO. SCREAMS? NOO
Why on earth are there still Death Eaters around? Have they missed the memo that Voldemort died like 20 years ago? Are they trying to bring back a new dark lord? Is the dark lord Stannous? Omg so many questions
I'm glad Rose was still able to fully consider her surroundings and remember Lily is underage and in the back of the pub, she probably saved Lily by remembering that. She kept her head remarkably well despite all this triggering things happening around her and I'm proud of how she handled herself and also worried about her and everyone else. What an intense chapter. Well done
Aw, Rose really shouldn't be beating herself up over this, but it's kinda understandable that she does. It wasn't her fault, and she got Lily out, and just the fact that she kept herself together after everything she's alreayd been through proves how strong she is. I like that Ginny told Rose the truth about Hermione. Even though Rose probably doesn't want her mum to know about everything that happened to her, Hermione can relate and that's so important to have another set of shoulders to help with the burden. There seemed to be a lot of healing in this chapter, both emotionally between Rose and Ginny and Hermione, and physically, as Scorpius came back with his injury. It's awful to hear that three people died, but I'm glad for Rose that no one else in her family was fatally injured, or she'd still be blaming herself for leaving. I think this chapter is essential because Rose is maybe starting to see that there are different ways to help out, as Rose clearly helps out at the end. Not everyone can be casting the spells - some people don't think well on their toes and that is okay. I'm really glad she has Ginny to talk to about this. Another wonderful chapter!
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For our review swap OMG WHAT IS THIS IT IS SO INTENSE. And mysterious. What happened to Scorpius?? I'm assuming something happened to him and that's why this picture triggers Rose's PTSD. Your Rose seems really interesting so far and I lke that you've put your characters in Ravenclaw to mix up the next gen a little and do something differently.
I also like the mix of emotions you've covered in this chapter, from Rose's mysterious horrible event in her past, to the nostalgia of sorting, and even a little humourous bit about the hat drinking firewhisky lol. There's a lot of feeling here.
I am so curious about what happened and I NEED to find out, so you've clearly done a great job setting up your story. Great writing, and thanks for the swap!! ♥
Haunting banner by amoretti @ TDA
Twenty-one years. It had been that long since he had found her alone in the courtyard.
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Hi Alexis! I just discovered the hot seat had continued on Twitter, though I missed it until now so I'm sorry about this very delayed review! Anyway, this is for the hot seat!
Awww, this was so sweet. An adjective I never thought I'd use to describe a story about Snape and Lily, because I'm not the greatest fan of Snape, but this is just so... innocent. (Mostly. But it's SO in character that Snape turned his face so she wouldn't just kiss him on the cheek.. :P ) I think the fact that they're just kids though, best friends - and Snape is in the mindset of being so genuinely happy and not hating everyone, it is sweet. And the fact that it's just this one moment, when the beginning and the end of the story are an adult Snape many years later, very alone. It just emphasizes the happiness of that one moment.
And your descriptions are gorgeous - it makes the scene just magic.
For a moment, the veil between worlds stretched thin until it was merely a pale gossamer curtain that separated the past from the present. -- I absolutely LOVE this visual. Beautiful.
Great work on this story!!
Gorgeous banner by katharos @TDA
Hermione Granger is given one chance to prevent a horrifying future in which Voldemort won the war.
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Another one for the hot seat!
Wow, this was... I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't this. I really loved it though once I figured out what was going on. I've been kind of getting more into AU lately and this was a really interesting, dark, horrific view into what the world would be if Harry had lost and Voldemort triumphed. Scary place.
But so well written. Like, I can't even imagine how broken and empty Hermione would have to be to agree to this in the first place and literally go back in time to seduce Tom Riddle (and kill him, but honestly killing him would be easier I think :P ) Even if he thinks she's someone else. She's got to be so desperate. And based on the snippets of what the post- war world is like, the torture and Hermione watching everyone she loves be destroyed, I can see how it would have gotten her to actually go through with it. She's sacrificing herself, because she has nothing left anymore, just to make sure that this never happens. I feel like I just got punched.
Though then, she's rewritten the future in a way she can't possibly know what she created instead. :O
A great story - so chilling and really showcases the psychological horror of the war. Nice job.
Lovely banner by katharos @ TDA
For Peter Pettigrew, the descent into darkness began in her arms.
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More for the review hot seat!
Ooh, I really liked this story. I've never seen Peter/Narcissa before, and what an interesting exploration of what made him decide to switch sides. The way you describe the Marauders' friendship in the beginning especially - of course it can't always be as idyllic as it was at Hogwarts, playing pranks and just having a grand time. Life in the real world at war with voldemort is much harder, and it strains their friendship - so Peter finds solace elsewhere when he's lost.
The choice of Narcissa was really interesting too. Since it's from Peter's POV we don't really see what is genuine and what is an act? How long did Lucius know - the whole time? But Peter, I find so easy to believe because his whole life he's been lesser than his friends, the short, ignored one who has a "rat-like face" - so when the girl of his dreams makes a move on him, how could he possibly say no? I found his reaction pretty realistic.
I also have to say that you're really good at writing the sensual scenes. It's so easy to make that kind of thing either too vague, or else tooo much, and you've managed to strike this perfect balance that is descriptive but doesn't take away from the overall story - it adds to it.
This is a wonderfully written fic, thanks for the great read. Nice work!
Stunning banner by the lovely page thirteen. @TDA
Roxanne Weasley and Natalie Thomas-Finnegan settle into their new home.
For caomoyl and Lost Muse's The New Home Challenge
I have become a gooey puddle of DNA on the floor after reading this adorable fluffathon. I love both of these characters and I'm so glad that they are going to be together forever (because let's be real: they are) and of course I loved the mention of Deamus in this as well :D I love how easy and fun their banter is, and how their new home has some weird things like a hideous (or quaint and character-providing, depending on how you look at it) chandelier, or water drips on the walls, but it's home because it has both Roxanne and Natalie in it and that's all they need. Could this story possibly be any cuter? (No. It could not.) Do you appreciate how almost all of my sentences start with "I love" ? In case it wasn't clear, I loved this story.
Stunning banner by page thirteen. @TDA
Petunia Evans imagines life at Hogwarts.
First place in beyond the rain's click and drag challenge :D
I love your effective way of establishing settings. After all, one can't write a story about the 70s without a shag carpet making an appearance. :P
But anyway, this story was beautiful and sad. What I love most about it is that Petunia is so understandable here. I feel badly for her, and I can even relate to her, in a way, because this is before she becomes so entrenched in bitterness. She's just sad and left out. I think it's because at this point in Lily and Petunia's lives, there's a sense that they still could have worked things out - the feeling of "it's not too late". This is only Lily's first year, and Petunia still missees having her sister around. She's lonely, and meanwhile Lily is off exploring a whole new world that Petunia longs for but can never have. And to rub salt in the wound, Lily is spending a lot of time with someone Petunia looks down on (Snape). It really comes across that Petunia feels like she's been replaced by a more interesting world with interesting people and Petunia can never really share in that, even if she gets the letters. The letters just tell her what she's missing. Ah, it's just so sad, the way they fell apart, and this story is especially powerful as it's right on the cusp of when that happened.
And another thing that really makes it hurt the feels is because Lily clearly forgives Petunia for whatever mean things she might have said before, and is writing to Petunia because she's so excited to share all of this with her sister. She's so optimistic. It hurts!
I also admit that all Petunia's wonderings and fanciful imaginings of what her life would be at Hogwarts - it got me thinking about what house Petunia would be in, if she were a witch. I couldn't see her in Gryffindor or Hufflepuff. And the way she likes to imagine herself as being the best at what she does fits right in with Ravenclaw or Slytherin... overall I think Slytherin. Wouldn't she just love to know she would share a house with Severus Snape, haha.
The last line is so sad. Clearly Petunia cares a lot. I think she always did, to some extent, she just never really showed it - not at this point, and certainly not later in her life when she was married. You know, Petunia is such an interesting character and I honestly love reading about her. I'm so glad you decided to write about her.
You mentioned Petunia's venom in your A/N and I agree with you, I think the story is just perfect as is - after all, she's around 13 here and still getting used to the idea that her sister is special and lives a different life that Petunia can only imagine and be jealous of. I think you're right, the snappy bitterness she developed was something that took years - right now she's just lost and lonely, but too proud to show it.
This was great, and I loved the insight into the Evans sisters.
Hi Kayla! I keep hearing great things about this story so I guess it's about time to read it!
AHH okay I wasn't prepared for it to start like this :'( But it's a very effective start. Before we get to all my feelings about the second half of the chapter, I'll start with the beginning - I like that James and Sirius are Aurors (or rookie Aurors at least). For Sirius in particular it seems like just the perfect thing for him to do because he's the sort of person who really wants to make a difference and can't sit idle if horrible things are happening. (So it must be just awwwwful for him to be stuck at a desk.)
And then that report - my heart broke a little. For all Sirius says about how Regulus was just like the rest of his family and he was an idiot and whatever, I've always had this headcanon that Sirius really cared about Regulus, even if he'd never admit it to anyone. And what a horrible way for him to find out what happened to his brother. A filed report. (I can't believe they gave that report to him)
Your characterisation of Sirius is wonderful too (this comes as no surprise really :P ) - how he jumps up and has to get to the bottom of this and is understandably angry and upset, and doesnt realize he's yelling. That's just what I'd expect in these circumstances - you do a great job iwth his character.
I am glad that he knows that Regulus wasn't just a Voldemort supporter to the end, though. But... that doesn't really make it any easier, I suppose. He's still dead. Poor Sirius :(
This is a great first chapter and I'm interested to see how things develop now that Sirius has this news. excellent writing!
I love the description of Remus in the beginning, it really shows how close Sirius and Remus are in the way that Sirius can read all of Remus' different moods even though the two versions of calm look almost identical.
Sirius' state of mind after finding out about his brother's death is really well written and fits in to what you've established of his characterization. He's still in shock, but ultimately he needs to be doing something in order to not dwell, that's what helps him cope (or just not think about it), so he goes to the meeting.
Once again you do a really impresive job of getting into Sirius' head, and right now it's not a pleasant place to be, he's sulky and depressed, and you never say any of that directly, but it's in the silences and how he gets lost in his head and doesn't have the energy to not sound bitter and short with people. Of course, this is understandable considering what he's just been through. I feel so bad for him and I'm really glad that he has the other Marauders looking out for him, even in he insists he doesn't need it all the time.
Dumbledore's request is... interesting. Poorly timed, for sure, because he literally just lost his brother to that group. And it's very like Dumbledore to ask something like that of him, because when you really think about it, he used Harry as a tool to win the second war for Harry's particular abilities/chosen one status, whatever. He is very strategic and sees the different things people offer and how to use that to their side's best advantage, but sometimes I don't think he considers the emotional effects of that. It was true with Harry and it's true how you;ve written it here.
Another wonderful chapter ♥
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I gotta say, Hermione/Snape is not something I normally read but I do love time travel fics. :D So anyway - I love where you've started with this - immediately after the final battle. You've described Hermione's state of mind really well, and all those events that happened in the past 28 hours (wow, was it really only that long? That was several chapters in DH and I can't believe it was all within one day omg, I can't blame Hermione for being unable to sleep as she's thinking about so much!)
It makes a lot of sense to me, that Hermione would see the good side of Snape and that he actually was helping, because she does tend to think far more rationally than Ron or Harry (and yes, I think they would have reacted pretty similar to how she expected, if she'd brought up the idea that Snape was actually working with the Order!)
Classic Dumbledore to be extra confusing and only talk in riddles. While ordinarily I'd be surprised at Hermione just undertaking a task without thinking about all possible repercussions, I realize that at this point she's gone through 28 straight hours of war and death and terrible things so she's kind of desperate - or as much as she ever gets.
I think you captured the more unpleasant side of time travel here especially after such a long day, when Hermione is sick at the end of it. I imagine that travelling so far back in time would be a shock, not to mention what she's already been through! Poor Hermione :(
Great introductory chapter! You've set the scene very well for an interesting plot with all sorts of things that can happen from time travel. Thanks for the swap!
*Transferred from HPFF*
I love the way you started it out - I know this is just a little thing but it is SO Hermione - the way she notices each of these little details and that's how she puts together where she is. I mean you could have said, "Hermione woke up in the hospital wing", but the way you have it not only tells us that it's the hospital wing, but kind of sticks the reader into Hermione's mind so you are putting pieces together the same way she is. It's cool. :D
Also, when she's leaving the hospital wing and walking down the corridor - this is like, maybe 10 seconds of time but there's so much going on in Hermione's mind, as she thinks about everything and what happened and what's going to happen, it's really great. You are awesome at writing Hermione!
Hermione sat and mulled it over for a bit more. She was still not sure why she shouldn’t warn everyone of what is to come. Then just maybe, she wouldn’t have to grow up in the same world that she did. -- Nooo Hermione don't even think it! Then you won't go back in time in the first place! Aghh time paradoxes! Grr! (but i love them really)
I think it makes a lot of sense for her to join Ravenclaw instead, as Snape will be more likely to talk to a Ravenclaw, and as well she will be (hopefully) out of the way of the Marauders and Lily. Though I have a feeling that it's not going to go as well as planned...
ahahaha Uncle Albus, that's going to be a difficult one to remember! :P
I'm really enjoying seeing how Hermione is adjusting and all the challenges she will face. I can't wait to see how she deals with them!
Great chapter :)
I'm really excited to come back to this story!
I am like extra impressed with Hermione now because imagine all she's had to do in the past 48 hours and she hasn't eaten anything. I would seriously not even be functional if it were me in her place.
(that's about where I stopped the rolling review because I got sucked into the chapter, and I couldn't take my eyes away from it! haha.)
I LOVE going through Hermione's thoughts as she considers ALL the things that are going to be different! This is one thing I love about stories that mess about with timelines: there's so many things that can change to produce so many results, and if Hermione does one thing, she could be remembered for it later, her roommates will know her in the future, etc. so it was really neat to see her comprehend all of it. That's going to be a lot of glamour charms while she's there, though - how long do they last? I wonder if anyone will ever find out that her real hair is brown and frizzy. :p
I absolutely loved when she met with Madame Rosmerta and they chatted in the Three Broomsticks. Especially because of Hermione's grudge against her and then she turned out to be so nice. I thought that was great.
Seeing Death Eaters, aah! I guess it's not as bad in this time period as no one knows who she is, she's not the best friend of the Chosen One and all that, so she's got a bit more anonymity but still eeek it must have been so terrifying to see Bellatrix alive and well again!
LOCKHART :D AHAHA YES
And we are introduced to all our favourite Marauder era characters ;) I really can't wait to see how Hermione interacts with all of them.
Ooh, one thing that was really cool, which I only realized now - when they said "hey sorry Snivelly" I knew it was Snape, but I'd forgotten Hermione didn't know that nickname as she didn't see that scene in the Pensieve. So well done on that, how Hermione doesn't exactly pay attention to the person on the floor until she sees him at the end.
Awesome chapter! Thanks so much for the swap :)