Transferred from HPFF
Now I'm amazed by our work after I finished reading your story. When I saw banner of your story and read the summary, I had no idea that you would write a big story like this.
On the first half, I interpreted that you wrote how Tiberius was obsessed with the idea of learning Muggle studies and persuading his father to allow him to. Even he was kept in detention after he discussed the way with his friend, and involved his friends in the operation to pursue the aim to get the permission. You created a determined young man who pushed forward trying every possible means.
And I was struck with awe when I read the latter half. You incorporated all problems in our mordern world, nukes, agricltural problems. Knowing Muggles deeper led Tiberius to erase Gomez who was Muggle-Born. You portrayed how the crime was committed from the beginning by epistolary technique, it was marvelous. You expressed how dangerous the young man who is tied to one ideology is, through J.K.Rowling's magical world. I was very very impressed by your great work!
Hi there, it's your valentine puff here, to spread some love and joy! :D
Wow. This was something else. I wasn't expecitng the format of the story but it fits perfectly, and makes the story so much more intregining. I loved how it spanned several years but barely feels like any time at all because of the different formats you used.
This is an exciting story, and I love the idea, eseically the twist at the end. I did not expect that to happen. I still can't believe he murded her, although I feel like there might be more to the story. That's the fun part of seeing it from more than one P.O.V, and not just the MC, it feels like there's more to the story.
I loved your choice of character as well, and the relationship he has with 'Posy', you can see it develop through the years and especially from her view in the staments. You've developed interesting characters and I think I'm going to have to look at more in this series as want to find out more about them, especially Posy and their circle of friends. Just from that one detention slip I feel like they got up to a lot at Hogwarts and inlife in general.
This was an exciting story, espeically the way it's written, and I'm looking forward to reading more of this series! :)
*Transferred from HPFF*
Another one for the review hot seat.
What a great story! Often I review as I read, but I just got so absorbed in this one I forgot to do that :P (Sidenote: I can't fathom how you thought this was rusty. It was anything but.)
So first let's talk about the variety of different sources you used and how they all put together such a complete story. It doesn't feel like it needs traditional narration at all - everything you need is there, and what's beautiful is that it's so subtle. No narrator is there to interpret what happens, you just present all the facts and then the reader themselves has to draw their own conclusions. And I love that. Especially the bit about Posy disappearing, and then Artemisia Burke just happens to visit Tibs' father, and immediately afterwards is arrested and then has an alibi. That's what is said, but there's so much more going on here that's never said. I love how epistolary writing - and especially your story - encourages a reader to look between the lines and see how Posy is behind all of this (with Polyjuice potion I expect? or something) Her escape was quite a bold move, I have to say!
As for the plot itself re: Tiberius - Most of the way through I was caught in this weird indecision, because I suspected that he would end up as a Death Eater, but his desire to take Muggle Studies didn't really fit in with that, and in fact seemed pretty genuine. I mostly believed it. There were some warning signs though, like his essay where he started to write Mudblood instead of Muggle-born, and the end of his essay: That's why I chose this subject. Because that needs to change. -- Clever. Because there are a number of ways that could be interpreted.
I was so surprised Tiberius' father was having an affair with a Muggle-born woman! It makes his disgust with Tibs taking Muggle Studies even more hypocritical. Or perhaps he was worried Tibs would find out about it?
What happened in the end though, that was such a great twist. I wasn't sure who the last voice was, telling that last story, but what an ending. It showed a lot about the other side of Tibs and provided a lot more of an explanation as to why he took the class in the first place - as well as indicating how twisted and manipulative he really was from the beginning (even from the age of 12/13 when he first signed up for that class!)
Really well done. I was so impressed by this story - it's wonderful. Nice job.