Hi! Here from Review Tag!
This is the first time I've ever read anything about Greyback, and I think you really did well with developing his backstory. I love stories that fit into the canon without going against it, so I really like that you built into his character as it wasn't really developed in the books.
One thing I didn't know if it was a mistake: "You were in the Dark Lord's employ for nearly seven years, from a cold winter's day in early 1982 to the night he attacked the Potter boy on Halloween of 1981," were these two dates supposed to be reversed? I don't know if I read it correctly.
I think you did a really good job of building the tension, and the choice of second-person was really good in making it feel almost intimately dark. I think the pacing was really good too.
I think if I would have wanted anything else, it would be to maybe touch upon how he became a werewolf. Maybe mention his childhood? Maybe just to help the readers develop a mental picture of Greyback.
Great job! :D
I swore I changed that when I went through it the other day, gah! Thanks for pointing it out, I have edited it. Who knows what my math was when I wrote that. Thank you for taking the time to read and review. :) R