Do I want it to be over sooner to free you, or do I want it to be slow so I can keep you longer? Always both. I feel this. I feel this so much. Actually, I feel every single word you wrote so much.
And yes, your AN was so poignant too. Grief is really a lonely experience. Almost as if you should feel ashamed of it. And it really shouldn't be like that. So thank you for sharing something so personal with us, I know how difficult it can be.
I can't really be coherent right now because, really, everything you said I could've said and I'm just too emotional at the moment. But many, many hugs your way!
Lots of love and a huge snowball hug,
I'm so happy that I found this story. It's absolutely beautiful.
I haven't had to watch a loved one die, which I'm so thankful for, but I spoke to my grandma in the days before she passed. She was in the hospital your mom, and I did sense some of that confusion and drifting in our last conversations. But more than that, this story resonated with me because I lost a close friend suddenly several years ago. (He was struck by a car when he was riding his bike.) I didn't have a chance to say goodbye, but I'll never forget the enormity of my feelings after his death. This story felt like it was speaking to those feelings.
The emotions throughout were lovely. The narrator's difficulty in knowing whether or not they want their mom to linger or pass quickly feels so real to me remembering what my grandma went through. Sometimes I wish I'd been able to be with her—the rest of my family was, but I live across the country—but then I'm also not sure if I would want those memories...I think that struggle is something similar to the narrator of this story.
Anyhow...I just want to say that you did an absolutely beautiful job with this story. The emotions were moving; the plot was compelling and relateable; the writing was concise and precise. Well done, really.
P.S. - The line, "It feels as if the whole world is holding its breath, waiting for the birth of a new death.", was stunning.
Hey! I came across this in the queue, and I just wanted to leave a quick review, because it really spoke to me; my mom is sick and doesn't have that much time left, and this spoke to so many of the things that I've been feeling as I've watched her over the past few years. Thank you for writing it - you did an amazing job.
Hi Branwen, thanks so much this means a lot! I can't even imagining experiencing this over years rather than months, wishing you every strength & I hope it goes as well with your mum as is possible in the circumstances. Thanks for taking the time to review! Sending lots of love your way <3