Hey, Claire! Here for our swap! :)
Oh, poor Lyra... but I guess she sort of asked for it? I mean, I can understand that Mai would feel unconsidered and while I feel really bad for Lyra I can't blame Mai for trying to make the night interesting for herself... A traumatic awakening, but Lyra probably needed it...
But let's start from the beginning. :P
Poor Lyra, she seems to be working crazy shifts... sleeping out of the regular hours is not funny (nor healthy, in effect) I can't blame her for being a bit annoyed. I loved her interactions with Roxi and how she can make her say yes to anything... They have a sweet relationship :)
Warrington is really unsufferable, so full of himself... but some people are like that by nature, you just have to put a brave face on it... Lyra should really slow down with work, though... (I mean, maybe she doesn't really have a choice, but judging from her character, she probably isn't very good to speak for herself?)
I was so happy at the little flirting between her and Mai. I was there like "Awww, cute". But then their date was kind of disastrous, and now I'm so sad... I really hope Lyra will learn something from that, at least.
This was a great chapter! I really loved it! And you also have such a lovely writing style, it's really so nice! :)
Thank you for the swap!
Hello lovely! I am here in the spirit of next gen and snowballs, and WHY HAVEN'T I READ THIS BEFORE?!
You know I always love your writing, and now I'm super excited to read further into Lyra's adventures. She already comes off as super relatable; constantly taking care of the drunk/hungover roommates while working as a Healer. I'm glad that someone called her out on it in the first chapter though, I have a feeling that it's going to stay with her for a while.
This chapter does a great job with setting up the story without giving too many details, but leaving me eager enough to want to know more. Is there a reason that Lyra's always taking care of everyone, apart from it's what she's always done? And I'm curious to see how she fits in with the Wotter clan; apart from going to Hogwarts together, I'm very curious as to what her relationships with them are like -- I'm guessing she's already pretty close with Roxanne and Rose if she's living with them, but you've set up an interesting cast of characters in a short amount of time, and I've gotta applaud you for that.
The dynamics at St. Mungo's are also super interesting, and I'm curious to see how they're going to play into the story as well. I snorted at the line, "I grew up with Fred Weasley - you get used to it." and I love how everyone just sort of nods and understands, and it's great to see Fred's legacy living on.
Excellent first chapter and I'm excited to see where this goes!
Hi Claire! Here for our swap! :)
I was really uncertain about what to pick, then I saw this was a FROGS nominee and it seemed interesting so I decided to stop here.
I really enjoyed this first chapter. :) I like Lyra's character, I think I could get along with her (I certainly could sympathize when her alarm went off... Monday mornings are the worst thing ever!)
It seems like her group of friends are a difficult bunch to deal with/take care of... it's still cute how she takes care of them all, and the whole waking-up-everybody scene was just so hilarious, I loved reading it! :D
I can see why Felicity would be worried about that, though. They are adults and they can't rely on Lyra forever. And she can't always be there for them, either; she needs to live her life. Guess something is going to happen that will change the status quo? I wonder what it is?
I love the OCs you introduced at St Mungo's, I can't wait to get to know them more. I really loved your characterization of everyone so far, actually. Even if we got only glimpses we can already see some of their different traits, which is so lovely!
I really loved your writing in general. It flowed so well, you have some really nice description and the dialogue feels so natural. Great job on this first chapter! :)
Hopefully I won't forget to come back here sometime. For now, thanks for the swap and the lovely reading!
Lots of love,
Hi Claire! I'm here for BvB.
This fic has been on my TBR for a while and I'm glad I finally started reading it :) I really like the reference to The DUFF in the title and I think this is such a realistic concept, the mum friend (especially because among my friends, I'm 100% the mum friend).
So far, I really like Lyra--she's very witty and sweet and likable. I LOVE your characterization of Albus, Scorpius, Rose, Louis, and Roxy--I can already see their personalities sort of developing, which is pretty impressive considering I've only read ~2.5K. Usually it takes far longer for me to seethe wrsonalities of OCs or Next Gen characters.
I love that Lyra's working as a healer; I think it fits so well with her being the mum friend, feeling the compulsion to take care of everyone all the time. I'm wondering where she got this compulsion, and am generally very curious about Lyra as a whole. She's an intriguing and likable OC who I can really relate to, which is awesome!
Also, I ship her with Warrington... maybe because he seems sort of like a Mr. Darcy type character, and I have such a huge soft spot for Mr. Darcy type characters :D (And also because I'm the kind of person to ship two people after only one interaction hehe). :D
anyway, this was a great first chapter! :)
Hey there! :) Dropping by for our review swap! :)
I was so excited to see you wanted me to stop by on this story, because I love this story - honestly, I'm just so terrible at remembering what I'm still reading and need to catch up on :/ BUT I'm here now :)
I love this chapter - there's something so honest about it, yk, about the conversations they have with each other: about Lyra's worries and fears about whether or not looking out for her friends, which is something she's good at and enjoys doing and is important to her, is somehow holding her back from having relationships, and the way her friends respond to her voicing those. It's the kind of thing which is so familiar to anyone who's been the mum friend, or who's had a mum friend. It's so real and you have such a talent for tapping into that and writing in a way which makes me feel like it actually happened somewhere - if that makes sense :P
Also, I love the way you show Lyra's friends rallying around her: they all want her to be happy, they probably spent a long time before Lyra woke up talking about what happened, wondering and all that, and it's so lovely how they tell her she shouldn't feel guilty about what Mai said to her, shouldn't let it get to her or believe that it's really true - though they're kinda half right :P Like, it's never going to help if you kinda ignore someone, especially on essentially the first date. But poor Lyra, it's so easy to do it accidentally, yk? There are few things I love more than friendship scenes in fic, though, so I loved everything about this.
Rose made me laugh - 'they want to ask you about Mai, but they wanna be obtuse', haha, bless! Though tbf, it's often easier to just say it bluntly and get on with it, I guess :P
Noooooo poor Lyra! I kinda guessed/worried she'd end up thinking again about what Mai and Felicity said about her looking out for her friends being such a problem with relationships, but I didn't think she'd take it so seriously or worry about it so much as to ask Louis for advice and help to actually stop caring/worrying about them so much. Granted, it's probably healthy to worry a bit less and trust that they can do stuff for themselves more often than she does, but it's so so harsh to feel you have to change yourself because of something someone else said :(
Also, I gotta say quickly, you gotta teach me how to dialogue, because honestly I find it so hard but you seem to do it so easily and so flawlessly - it's always witty and real and funny and just... so good. Tell me your secrets? :)
Why can't you just make Lyra happy?! :( Blehhhh, hmm... hopefully next chapter will be happier? More Louis, though (he's hilarious, honestly. Poor bloke, with his last client firing him :P)! :)
Thank you so much for the swap - and I loved this story, as always! Hopefully it'll be less time until I'm back :P
I'm here for our review swap! yay!
So, I've been a fan of this story for a while so it's awesome that I've grabbed the opportunity to review it properly because I've really enjoyed what you've been doing with it so far. I think it's a really original plot line to explore.
So the best thing about this story is your OC, Lyra. I've been really impressed since the first chapter about her characterisation, you pretty much nail everything about her. she comes across with a really strong voice of her own which is really important for creating a believable and likeable character. it's something that you really pull off well. I think you've managed to even in 5 chapters make Lyra quite a layered character. I think one that you can relate to. So in this chapter, you did a really good job of exploring her thoughts and feelings about not going out. It was quite important for Lyra to refuse because she's normal always there as it's difficult thing for her to say no. it's complicated thought progress for her. It's really interesting internal battle that you've created for her and it feels raw and realistic.
I'm also enjoying Lyra being a career girl and stuff, I love interaction with her co-workers and her sarcastic comments and banter is also really well written. I'm a sucker for a cliffhanger and I loved the way you did it, obviously I want to know what happened with Rose! I don't know if it's going to have long lasting effects but I'm sure it's going to be really interesting to see Lyra's action as she wasn't there, I wonder if there will be elements of guilt here for Lyra so I think your storytelling and ending has got me hooked for another chapter! good job on this!
- Abbi xo
I love Lyra so so much already. She is such. A. Mum. The whole first scene is so amazing and it has completely won me over. Going around with prepared coffee and waking up all the hungover peeps is so hilarious and I already know that this story is going to be gold.
Seriously, it usually takes me more than half a chapter to get to know and like an OC, but I'm already so impressed with Lyra. Plus there's also the fact that you've given her such a cool job! It's so different from anything I've read, and I love the fact that it's so busy on a Monday after the weekend :P
Side note: I love that spelling of Rebekah. One of my very dear friends spelled her name like that <3
I didn't even make the connection that taking care of people is quite literally her job until she said it haha. She must make the best Healer.
Yep, okay, I'm in. This is such a fantastic first chapter and I can't wait to find out what you have planned!
Hey Claire - dropping by for BvB! :D I was so glad to see you'd updated, and that I could catch you in the battle - it's such a great story :)
I love the way you develop Lyra's character in this - how she's almost always working, how she doesn't survive without coffee (I feel that. Tea for me, but I feel it nonetheless :P), how she's always the responsible one in the group, and how she's so hurt when the girl she liked goes off with someone else. They're all such real things - and I loved how you showed how easy it is to really not be okay when something like that happens, regardless of how long you've known someone. If you like them, it hurts, regardless of how long it's been.
I'm not sure I like Mai atm. I get it's not a great date - being out with someone who's very focused on making sure other people are okay, but it's not as bad as she's making it out to be, imo. It definitely wasn't bad enough she needed to leave that much - like, whaaa? I felt so bad for Lyra in that moment, especially at the end, when Jessie pointed it out to her. Such a cruel thing to do :(
I like, though, how you've shown how taking care of people is great, and all, but can end so badly. It's a hard job, and someone's got to be the more responsible one, but it's so easy to get wrapped up in it to the exclusion of everything else. I'm so so looking foward to where you go from here, what happens with Lyra and whether she ever meets Mai again, because I'm so curious about what other facets of being the mom friend you're gonna pull out - and mostly, also, because I want Lyra to be happy :P
Your writing in this is so great, too - it's so clean and precise, and the flow is perfect, and there's exactly the right balance of dialogue and description, and really, it's so so impressive. The only thing I spotted was you say at the beginning 'she squinted her eyes' but the 'her eyes' isn't necessary - you can only squint with your eyes ;) But apart from that, this was perfect! :)
I'm so so looking forward to the next update! :D
Aph xx (transferred from HPFF)
Hey, Aph! Thank you so muc for dropping by! I'm so sorry for not getting back to you sooner.
I'm so happy that you like Lyra's character so much. She's definitely one of my favorites to write and I'm glad that her struggles come across as relatable.
I definitely did not intend for Mai to be so awful haha. Looking back at it now, I probably went a bit overboard, but to be fair Lyra can be more than a little clueless. It's time for her to learn that's it's okay to be a little selfish sometimes and put herself first.
Thank you again for the wonderful review!
Hey there, Claire! :D Dropping by for the BvB! :)
Okay, so I've seen this around the forums the last couple of days, and I really wanted to read it so bad - and luckily uni slacked off on me in time so I could jump in the BvB behind you and grab this :P So I'm here! :)
I love the start of this! I think it's so super true that there are always guys/girls who are the 'dad' or 'mum' of the group, and it's a huge responsibility, you know? I did that for some friends, once, and it was crazy! Helpfully distracts you from your problems, though... but anyway, back on track: I think it's a very real phenomeon and I love that you're exploring it in fic because I think it's very rarely seen outside of real life, you know? It's a part of life which just doesn't get talked about so I'm so excited :)
I love the way you've immediately started it with this, showing exactly what it means, you know? And how she has a job which is taking care of people, too, so it's kinda all she does - it sets up so beautifully and so simply, but not obviously, for something to go wrong and for her to find it getting so much harder :/ She's such an interesting character, with her insistence that it's fine, that she can sort of do anything, and it's such a true and human flaw.
I keep repeating myself, haha, but realism is something I love so much because it makes everything so much more interesting and difficult, you know? :P
Your writing in this is so lovely, and you have such a great set up. I love how you used the different sections - and your writing in this was so flawless, it flowed so perfectly and really, there's not much more to say than that :) I've read bits of your writing before, but I didn't remember it being this good, which is a major fail on my part.
So. Final bit: you're going to have to update this, and I'm going to have to come back. Capiche? ;)
Aph xx (transferred from HPFF)
I'm happy you like the premise of this! I actually started thinking of it while I was watching Sisters in the theater and spent the rest of the movie coming up with a plan!
This was definitely a fun project for me just because it's different from what I usually write. Realism is a huge thing for me in everything that I write, so I'm relived that it comes across as that for you.
Oh, wow, that's such a huge compliment coming for you :)
Thank you so much for the fantastic review!