Name: Dojh167 (Signed) · Date: 03 Dec 2017 04:41 AM · Chapter: Halloween

Lol so the first thought I had when I saw the format was that this was a Rose/Bellatrix chatfic. That would be Ghoulish. Okay, back to reality.


Welp you have captured Bellatrix’s voice in a very realistic and in character way.


Ooh cool twist. Bellatrix is not quite a ghost, but she is certainly not gone. Interesting. Ooh and she can like possess Rose or something? I wonder if it’s only Rose she can control, or if she chose her.


Oh, now I read Rose with a decidedly Bellatrix-y tone. I find myself not seeing her as the victim so much as already fully lost to the darkness of Bellatrix. It hasn’t happened fully yet, but since you showed us that first scene, I have no reason to expect anything else.


Wow at “carve him like a pumpkin.” It sure is thematic


Oooh “crimson-coated corridor” is great imagery for Murder Day


No shouting in the library! Burgeoning debauchery indeed.


I couldn’t help but wonder just how much power Bellatrix had. Could Rose fight? Was there part of her that wanted this? Cause I like making dark things darker apparently =P


I like you you circled back and repeated the opening. You did a great job with this - it was super spooky and suspenseful!



Author's Response:

Heheh, I think I would read a Rose/Bellatrix chatfi :p.


Yay! I'm glad you thought I captured Blella well--my first time really writing her and yeah, it's a sort-of-possession and sort-of-ghost (I don't know, I went a little crazy and never really know what I'm doing :P). Heheh, I suppose that, much like the Imperius Curse, there are ways to fight against something like that, but I don't really think Rose knew what was going on until it was too late. And, to be perfectly honest, if Rose had a taste of the sheer amount of power and darkness that is Bellatrix, she could have quite enjoyed it. I haven't really explored her characterization enough to really say (I'm afraid of Next-Gen; gotta try to tackle that once I figure out how to write romance :P). 


:D I'm glad you liked it! 



Name: LadyL8 (Signed) · Date: 02 Dec 2017 03:19 AM · Chapter: Halloween

Hi Rumpel,


It's been a while since I've read anything of yours, so I thought I'd swing by and check out another one of your stories. Retribution from Beyond the Grave looks really interesting and I'm excited to see more of what it's all about, so I'm just gonna stop talking right and get right to it.


I love that intro. It really got me interested. Why would Rose kills James? Hm. And how is Bellatrix involved? Yeah, I'm really curious now. And the format of this story is very different from other stories I've read, but I really like it. It reminds me of those crime shows you see on TV, those really cheesy British ones where they start with a murder at some grand mansion and then reveal bits and bits of what happened throughout the episode (or maybe those are just big in Norway, idk :P). I love those shows. I watch them every Easter. But anyway, back to the format. Yeah, it's interesting, but I really loved it.


Ah, I see. Bellatrix is a ghost and she can poison someone's mind. Yeah, that makes sense. But poor Rose. That must suck, and it's certainly not any better that the boys are just joking around when she's feeling down. Yeah, I feel for Rose. But also, good job with Bellatrix. I loved seeing her thoughts. It definitely added some more depth to the character. I almost felt like I could understand her a little bit, which I'm kind of shocked to be able to say. And also, and I know I'm getting side-tracked a lot but, it's really interesting that Bellatrix chose to poison Rose's mind. It made me think of that scene in the books where Hermione takes polyjuice potions to look like Bellatrix. I don't know if you thought about that, but I found that to be an interesting little connection. I liked it.


Anyway, thanks for sharing. I really liked the story, it was so interesting to see how the story unfolded. It was a really dark piece, and I loved the time jumps/circularity. It really gave me that crime show-feeling. So yeah, great job!


- Lotte

Author's Response:

Hello, Lotte!


Heheh, this is definitely another experimental one to add to my shelf of experiments and, also, my first and only mystery :P.  My grandmother used to watch shows like that--they were her favorite! I don't see them on anymore, so I think they're probably not very popular over here (though I would totally watch them if I could ever find them)!  I'm glad you liked the story and the way it's formatted :D. Character exploration is always fun; I actually hadn't thought about Hermione and the polyjuice, but it does  make a nice little connection!


Thanks so much for the wonderful review!



Name: Felpata_Lupin (Signed) · Date: 07 Nov 2017 10:09 PM · Chapter: Halloween

Hi, Rumpel! Here for our swap! :)

I noticed this story when we swap last time, the summary looked intriguing, so I thought to stop by here and see what it was about.

Wow, this was creepy... poor Rose... it's so unsettling the way Bellatrix took control of her and made her turn against her friends and family... by the way, I think you captured Bellatrix's voice so wonderfully, which I find incredibly hard to do.

I loved the alternance of point of view, and shifting from first and second person. I don't think I've ever seen it done and I found it really interesting.

I think my favourite section was the first in Bellatrix's pov. I loved the description of Halloween celebration through her eyes and it was also fascinating the way you presented her way of thinking and her motives because, while I obviously can't agree with her, I can understand her to an extent and that's not something I would have expected.

I also really loved the dark atmosphere of the whole piece, the growing tension leading to the scene of the murder. It was so creepy the way Bellatrix played with Rose's mind till she led her to that point. I also loved how you started from the end and then retraced the steps leading there. I love circularity in stories.

This was a really interesting and enthralling read, wonderful job!

Thank you so much for the swap!



Author's Response:


Thanks so much for the swap! Hooray! I'm so glad you think that I handled Bellatrix well; I was extremely uncomfortable with both Bellatrix's character and Rose's character (first time truly wielding either), so that's a huge relief! I spend a lot of time in my OF swapping perspectives (first, second, third limited), so I've grown quite used to switching it up. It's actually more difficult now to stay in only one POV type, especially when I'm switching character perspective so I'm really happy that you enjoyed it! I think its just been something that has been happening out of habit :D. This was my very first time trying out a cyclical timeline as well. :D Your reviews are so sweet! I love that you love all of the different bits and pieces! 

Thanks a million for the wonderful review! 


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