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Reviews For What We Become

Name: Crimson Quill (Signed) · Date: 28 Sep 2017 06:32 PM · Chapter: Difficulties in Trying to Go Unnoticed

Hello,

 

I've not had the pleasure of reading anything from you yet so very excited to be here! I thought the idea of this seemed so interesting, it seems to be something quite different. I'm really looking forward to seeing how you progress the story because it sounds amazing already!

 

You have such a beautiful way with words, the first section how you describe that scene between Igor and Grace. There was so stunning imagery here. You used all the senses in your writing here, I really feel all the tension in this scene. it's so well written, I have no words to do this justice properly (sorry! he he) . I love that you used this as your first scene because this type of storytelling always produces questions.  I'm really drawn into this story because I have so many questions about how they got to this point. We met Grace in the next scene, it is just making me question how those two ended up together.

 

I do really enjoy how you used the time jumps to tell different parts of the story like her history with Sirius. I like the idea of the friendship group between the trio - Greta, Grace and Gideon. I look forward to see more of them in future chapters. I think this is an awesome first chapter because you've really captured my interest in your characters, you use Grace enough but she's still very mysterious. I think you've had an lovely balance in this chapter between giving some action but laying the groundwork. Great job!!

 

 

- Abbi xo 



Author's Response:

Hello, Abbi!

 

I'm really excited you stopped by this one -- it's brand new! Awww, and thanks! I wanted that first section to stand out from the rest, especially because it's a flash-forward and wanted people to be able to connect with it without really knowing the character's yet. And YES that's exactly the point -- you'll see that Grace is mostly wanting to go unnoticed and avoid the war and, of course, Karkaroff is a Death Eater (who's canonically renowned for his promotion of an environment and fear at Durmstrang later on) so the whole leading up point to how they got together is a huge part in the plot. (I'm so sorry, I'm really excited for this novel.) As for the time jumps, I love to experiment with my writing. This time I'll be experimenting with nonlinear storytelling and romance (dun, dun duuuun)!  Grace will become much more transparent as time goes on -- her motives and story become plainly stated, whereas possible ambiguity of other characters I've already started plotting out in my 'verse's as one-shot vignettes.

 

Thanks so, so much for the swap -- this review is wonderful! 

 

-Rumpels



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