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Reviews For Winding Road

Name: sunshine_locks (Signed) · Date: 19 May 2018 03:28 AM · [Report This]
Story:Winding Road Chapter: Chapter 1

I really like how you wrote Scorpius healing, how it wasn’t a straight path, that it can be zig-zaggy, that sometimes it can be three steps back, and maybe like half-step forward (who knows?).

 

Scorpius seems to struggle with grasping the reality of what happened, if his nightmares are anything to go by. He puts a mask up around his parents; perhaps to protect them?

 

I always kind of had the idea that Draco was a bit of a closed-off parent, but almost always caring for his child, and he was exactly that in this story. His indignant and protective tendencies over Scorpius is really nice, and it really shows how much he cares, that he’d literally fight the law for his son. It’s pretty sad that he even has to fight them at all, and it is kind of a parallel between our world and theirs. Abuse cases go unsolved, abusers roam free even, and sometimes the most that can happen is a restraining order. It’s rough.

 

The scene with Scorpius, Brandon, and Al was very sweet and organic. The details about how Albus got jealous of Brandon for not telling him about Cora’s mother was so adorable (though I hope it won’t devolve into anything horrible).

 

I’m liking that Scorpius is finally breaking out of his “cell” of sorts, and doing public outings, despite the fact that there are many chances for him to run into Corbin. And he did. I cannot tell you how proud I was of Scorpius for standing up for himself, and using the words of his healer! It took a lot out of him, for sure, but its progress, and every little bit counts.

 

I think it would be very interesting to see how Scorpius’ and Corbin’s relationship devolved into an abusive one, how Scorpius got out of it, and see how he recovers from his trauma (I mean, like a short story, or a novella of some sort).

 

Anyways, I think that’s all I have to say! Goodbye!



Name: Oregonian (Signed) · Date: 17 Sep 2017 04:50 AM · [Report This]
Story:Winding Road Chapter: Chapter 1

An interesting story, Rose.  I haven't read much of your work yet, so I don't know if this story is part of a larger head canon, but it certainly could be (probably is), and yet it stands alone very well.  The parameters of the situation are clearly stated, and you wisely focus on just one self-contained event, creating a well-structured story arc.  You show us the man behind the events, the man whose progress, even if slight during this one-day episode, gives the story its dynamic quality.



Name: Margaret (Signed) · Date: 10 Sep 2017 08:24 PM · starstarstarstar [Report This]
Story:Winding Road Chapter: Chapter 1

I really like the fact that you begin this in the present tense. It gives a sense of immediacy and makes us feel almost as if we are there, which helps give a sense of how Scorpius must be feeling.

 

And given what we know the theme of this story is, the comment, "you're mine" takes on creepy significance.

 

It didn't occur to me that it was a dream until you said he woke with a start, which I guess means you wrote it well. Even with the italics, I thought it might be a flashback to earlier times or something. Or sort of a prologue.

 

Really like the comment about Malfoy Manor not feeling like a home. My headcanon is that Draco never completely recovered from his experiences during the war and that as a result of that and the animosity towards the Malfoys from both sides of the war, Scorpius had a pretty tough time. I'm wondering if that's true here. That line sort of hints it might be.

 

I also like the way you have Scorpius think of the other person as "him." It feels like he doesn't even want to THINK the guy's name.

 

I really like the comment about numbers being a comfort. Sounds almost like a form of OCD. (And it looks like all my comments are just beginning, "I really like..." but I do.)

 

Actually, given how Hogwarts doesn't teach Maths, it is interesting that his talents lie there. Of course, kids have learnt BASIC Maths by the age of 11 but they would be basic. I guess he just has a natural talent.

 

Oh, his mother's overly cheerful tone! You really give a sense there of how helpless she feels and how she is TRYING to make things better but doesn't really know how. And it really fits the Malfoys that they WOULDN'T ask anything too personal. Can imagine them being awkward with shows of emotion.

 

And that is an interesting idea - that the wizarding world would only think domestic violence is a problem if magic is involved. It makes perfect sense, given how they look down on Muggle methods of everything. I've never thought of this before but I can well imagine there being a stigma to being harmed emotionally or physically without a wand.

 

Yeah, I can imagine Weasleys' having HILARIOUS defences against theft. You've really thought things through here.

 

It does seem like Scorpius dealt with that well.

 

At the end, you've written "has not be in force." I think you mean, "has not been."

 

LOVE the ending and the way it points out how this is not an easy situation. He no doubt loved Corbin once and it's unsurprising he'd feel some ambiguity.

 

Great story.



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